Remember that delightful feeling when you take a brand new smartphone out of the box at home? He's so beautiful and new! How to properly demonstrate your coolness using your smartphone in front of your friends, girls and strangers?
There is a widespread belief that those who use the phone to raise their social status in the eyes of others are doing wrong. Don't trust them! They just envy you. The dream of any girl is to meet a guy on her life path, lazily twisting a cool smartphone in her fingers. The article is divided into parts. Each part will tell you how to properly pontorez with a specific type of smartphone.
Table of contents:
- iPhone
- Android
- WinPhone
- Manufacturers
- Good luck!
iPhone
Whoever says anything, but iPhone you need to be able to demonstrate directly, conducting an aggressive presentation of his appearance to others. When you come with a company to a cafe, do not put iPhone on the table, like others! This is a gross mistake! Firstly, he can get scratched, and secondly, soon everyone will stop paying attention to him (and you). Just keep turning iPhone with the screen facing up. Do not forget to casually direct him towards the girl you like. They really like it. If you get a call at that moment, use this gift from heaven to showcase the apple logo on the back of your smartphone. During a conversation, make circular movements with your head so that the logo can be seen not only by the people sitting opposite, but also by everyone else. You can stand up so that you can also see from distant tables: here they call iPhone.
Do not argue with the owners of cheap smartphones on Android OS about widgets, file transfers, etc. Always respond with proud laziness to such heresy: 'I live in an ecosystem Apple where all the proposed scenarios for using a smartphone are irrelevant.' There are only two answers to the question about the cost of the phone. Option one: 'No, not expensive, it's Apple'. Option two: 'Inexpensive, I would buy the Gold Edition, but I can't find a golden snake skin case for it.' In this case, do not be shy about torn shoes – let them think that you are a kind of millionaire with quirks. About six months before the release of a new model, begin to slowly tell others how you are looking forward to this day. If you have the model before last, for example iPhone 4, you can also say that you are waiting for the release iPhone 7. Thus, you seem to have two at once iPhone in karma. Remember to highlight your elite status on forums such as discussions. The most popular expressions for you should be “poor” and “cheap Chinese miscarriage for the poor”. They can be used in any area of discussion. Talking about a smartphone camera – point out that this cheap Chinese camera is far from the camera iPhone. In addition, housing materials, communication quality, screens, appearance and comments from other users can be cheap and poor. Don't forget that compared to iPhone any other smartphone is obviously cheap, base all your statements on this simple truth. And God forbid you to write “rogue” – for this you will be banned because of the burning envy that the owners of cheap Chinese soap dishes have towards you.
Android
In the world Android – smartphones it is much more difficult to show off in front of friends, girls and complete strangers. The abundance of devices of any size, color and price played a cruel joke with pontorez. But there are simple rules that can add a couple of bonuses. Never buy a smartphone with a screen size less than 5.7 inches. Do not glue stickers on the body, it just looks like an attempt to make an expensive smartphone. It is better to buy a case of an unusual color. Bright lemon yellow leatherette looks great with light green headphones. It does not matter that you bought a cover for 200 rubles in the passage, you can say that it is an Italian exclusive, made from the navels of seagulls.
It is no longer possible to just buy an expensive Android flagship and be at the top of Olympus. We'll have to study what is inside it and how it works to explain its advantages over other smartphones and even iPhone. If you have a flagship, then start exaggerating everything you can. From instantly catching GPS satellites to clear headphone sound. If you have an inexpensive smartphone, then with its help you can rise above all others. There is always a fail-safe option for all occasions. This is 'murder iPhone'. Kill iPhone wherever he appears! He is your direct competitor and worst enemy. Let it just stick out a couple of millimeters from your shirt pocket, you should immediately grab your chance. Start a conversation from a distance, gradually, from 'I see you iPhone still hasn't bent?' and before 'How do I put widgets on it?'. You have already understood that in order to pontorezit using Android – a smartphone, you need to be able to tell fairy tales and understand, albeit a little, in technical aspects. This is, of course, more difficult than in the case of iPhone, but in the end you will get a more technically focused girl. As you know, like is drawn to like. With her, you will be able to talk on topics that the owner cannot understand iPhone, in your company he will feel uncomfortable, and you will enjoy a well-deserved victory.
WinPhone
WinPhone owners always praise its stable performance and reliability. Such people rarely like to show off. I don’t even know what to write here, maybe you remember the cases of successful use of pontos using the product Microsoft?
Manufacturers
You can charm a cat with a piece of delicious sausage, even if only for a few seconds, to become his best friend. Not remembering himself for joy, striped is ready for anything for a brief moment of gastronomic ecstasy. Electronics manufacturers are counting on a similar effect, beckoning photographers with optical stabilization, music lovers with sound chips, walkers with capacious batteries, connoisseurs of beauty with glass cases, dreamers with 64-bit processors, geeks with top lines in benchmarks. Such “cherries” can be found not only in the flagships of major manufacturers, but also among little-known smartphones from the Middle Kingdom. Manufacturers, as it were, give the novice pontorez the opportunity to choose their own path. And this is great! It's much easier for a photographer to smartly prove the superiority of his smartphone camera over other useless trinkets. It is easier for a musician to tell a girl about the aesthetic nirvana into which he is immersed using a music chip in his smartphone. All this suggests that manufacturers love pontorez! Pontorez to health, as they say.
Good luck!
After reading the article, you have more chances to achieve success with a girl, to put to shame yesterday's false idol at the institute, to win in a verbal skirmish on. Continue your pontore path and someday, maybe even tomorrow, you can become a hipster.